Help with social anxiety
Social anxiety is rarely shyness. It is an internal camera pointed at yourself while you are trying to hold a conversation.
Self-monitoring is the mechanism
Attention turns inward — how do I look, did that sound stupid, are they bored — and the inward turn is exactly what makes you seem distant. The performance degrades because attention has left the room. Treatment moves attention back outward, which is trainable.
- Rehearsing conversations before and after
- Blushing, sweating or shaking under observation
- Avoiding meetings, calls, parties or eating in public
- A post-mortem that runs for days
Where the belief came from
There is usually a scene: a class, a shift, a group, a moment of humiliation that installed a rule about yourself. Hypnotic work and EMDR-informed processing address that scene rather than arguing with the rule in adult logic, which almost never works.
Practice that is not exposure theatre
Real-world tasks are agreed with you, sized to be genuinely doable, and reviewed. Nothing is sprung on you and nothing is graded.
Common questions
Will you make me do embarrassing exposure exercises?+
No. Tasks are agreed together and pitched at a level you would actually attempt. Ambush exposure damages trust and rarely holds.
I am fine one-to-one but not in groups. Is that still social anxiety?+
Yes, and it is very common. Group settings raise the observation load, which is what the anxiety keys off.
Can this help with work presentations?+
Yes. Public-speaking dread is a frequent focus and often shifts faster than general social anxiety.
Get your attention back out of your own head
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